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for some reason i thought both of these were the same post and i sat for awhile trying to figure out which ice cream face was the weak bitch
I feel so alone.. sometimes it drives me crazy how alone i am. I get lost in my head thinking about questions that can never be answered. Or is it that I’m afraid the of finding out things i wouldn’t wanna know. Maybe its my lack of social life with others cuz i have no friends. I mean I use to, but they all somehow have disappeared. I just want one friend, just one.. but i guess my wall is built too high to have one. All i have is my boyfriend yet sometimes i get lost and seem to not recognize any faces, not even his. I feel out of place a lot, like i don’t belong. I know I’m not perfect but i try to be. No matter how good i treat someone, i never get the same in return. I don’t expect you to give me back the same in return, i just want a friendship/relationship. Is that too much? I would give up anything i have to help someone i don’t know but when i want a shoulder to cry on, i get left behind to cry myself to sleep while trying to keep quiet so no one hears me cuz if i explained it wouldn’t make sense to anyone. My whole life don’t make sense. I know i have it a lot better than most people but thats just the outside. No one knows what i go thru day by day i feel like i could die any second and i wouldn’t care. All this pressure and overthinking kills me, but i can’t help it. I just want everyone around me happy even if I’m not. One day when God decides to take me off this Earth, I hope everything in my life will finally all make sense.. i just hope i can hold on long enough for this roller coaster ride.
the cycle of my life.